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If it has tyres or testicles
By katak | November 19, 2007
HOW MANY times have I heard a sentence starting with those immortal words ‘The Trouble With Men Is That…’, but this time I received a little gem in my inbox from someone which goes some way towards explaining the anti-male feeling out there.
After all - not everyone can be as lucky as us men! 
Men are just happier people, but as my wife constantly tries to remind me, what else can you expect from such simple creatures? Still, the reasons we men are happy are many.
- Our last name gets to stay put.
- The garage is all ours.
- Wedding plans take care of themselves.
- Chocolate is just another snack.
- We can never be pregnant.
- We can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
- We can wear NO shirt to a water park.
- Car mechanics usually tell us the truth.
- There is no such thing as ‘too much’.
- We never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
- We don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
- We do the same work but get more pay.
- Wrinkles add to our character.
- People never stare at our chest when we’re talking to them.
- New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle our feet.
- We have one mood all the time. We can read maps and figure out GPS locations to the nearest three metres (we just can’t fold the maps up properly afterwards!)
- Our phone conversations can be over in 30 seconds flat.
- We know stuff about tanks.
- A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
- We can open all our own jars (well, sometimes).
- We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
- If someone forget to invite us, he or she can still be our friend.
- Our underwear is cheap.
- Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
- We almost never have strap problems in public.
- We are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
- Everything on our face stays its original colour.
- The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
- We only have to shave our face.
- We can play with toys all our life.
- We can get by with one wallet and one pair of shoes - one colour for all seasons.
- We can wear shorts no matter how our legs look.
- We can ‘do’ our nails with a pocket knife.
- We have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
Still, amazing really that for such a happy bunch it’s mostly us men who cause all the trouble in the world!
Then again, maybe not. 
Topics: Ask Men |
November 19th, 2007 at 12:05 pm
Good one bro hehehehehe.
November 19th, 2007 at 1:15 pm
Tat was so true. Kau tak baik, ada ke kau letak Jali as okt pimp haha.. Apa tu okt?
November 19th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
@Dec,
OKT = Pimp = “Captain”
November 19th, 2007 at 2:18 pm
New layout! Nice and simple! Woot!
How come there’s no short description for me though? Wahahahha.
November 19th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
@Zul,
I knew sooner or later you’re going to ask me this. Actually still thinking what to write about you and Yanni
November 19th, 2007 at 5:06 pm
You still have to shave other parts you know. Both men and women have to shave these other parts. Doo dee doo dee doo…
November 20th, 2007 at 1:33 am
Hey…i went on a 7-day trip wif 1 backpack ok…oh wait, i went on a 2-week expedition wif one backpack…=P
November 20th, 2007 at 8:19 am
@Halimah,
You sure or not ?
November 21st, 2007 at 3:17 am
xcuse me…i did!…i went to sikkim 4 a 2-wk expedition wif 1 huge backpack…really…one huge one…ehehe
October 26th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
# We do the same work but get more pay?
Yeah right…men have already compensated for that. Remember your 2.5 years?
I know your post is meant to be light-hearted, but assuming that men are simple creatures is quite simply, a false cliche. Men are as emotionally complex and (as history depicts) possibly more intelligent than women.
October 29th, 2008 at 11:06 am
Hi Retroflex,
After almost a year since the last comment, I am surprised to see a new comment on this entry.
As for your comments, I think that serving NS does not necessary means higher salary when you are working in a private sector.
Yes, to a certain extent, serving NS does have pay increment if you are working in the public service though.
Of course some men are emotionally complex as women but as a whole, the majority are pretty much simplistic when it comes to enjoyment.
Beer. Porn/Sex. Sleep.
How much simpler can that be ?